Christmas Greetings!

Recently I read a brief history on the House of Loreto.  According to tradition it was the home of the Holy Family and in the early centuries was miraculously transported to the town of Loreto in Italy.  The article contained three beautiful quotes that I believe send special messages to all homes not only during this blessed season but for each season throughout the year.

St. Josemaria reminds us of the valuable role of the ordinary homemaker with these encouraging words.  “We can’t foget that Mary spent nearly everyday of her life just like millions of other women who look after their families, bringing up their children and taking care of the house.  Mary sanctifies the ordinary, everyday things-what some people wrongly regard as unimportant and insignificant:  everyday work, looking after those closest, visits to friends and relatives.  What a blessed ordinariness!”  J. Escriva, Christ is Passing By, 148.

Pope Leo XIII echoes similar sentiments when he reminds us of the beautiful example of the value of ‘sharing the care’.  “What a wonderful model of dailing living the HOly Family offers us!  These three provide us with the perfect example of a Christian home.  Each person lives with a tremendous simplicity in carrying out daily responsibilities while pursuing common goals with genuine mutual affection.  There is not time for disorder or selfish pursuits.  Each one carries out his or her particular responsibilities with such human and supernatural affection that others are edified to hbehold it.”  Leo XIII, encyclical Laetitiae Sanctae, 3.

And finally a prayer by our dear Blessed John Paul II offered for us at the Sanctuary of Loreto:  “Accept, O Blessed Mother of the House of Loreto, my pilgrimage and that of all of us, as a common prayer for the family life of all the men and women of our age, we pray for the well being of these homes, that they may prepare the sons and daughters of all to enter into the heavenly dwelling of our common Father in Heaven.”

We wish each and everyone a very blessed Christmas and a holy and prosperous New Year!!!

There will always be a long running debate about the value of a weekly or monthly cleaning day for the family vs. the alternate idea of daily chores

What is good for one situation may not be for another. Below are eight suggestions to consider as you decide the pros and cons.

For a day of cleaning make sure your time frame is practical by considering everyone’s activities?

Try to make it as pleasant as possible by planning a fun lunch and music that all will enjoy.

Have the day well laid out according to job capability.

Remember to compliment their efforts while you are instructing and helping.

Keep in mind that all day cleaning whether weekly or monthly may bring resistance and establish a negative attitude.

The alternate idea of daily chores rotated among the children is a practical answer to a cleaning day.

It is always a worth while idea to post what needs to be done and by whom.

Be assured that a good job is usually its own reward but a sincere ‘thank you’ also goes a long way.

We all learn best by doing so whether it is through daily chores or weekly and monthly cleaning schedules including the children is one of the greatest gifts we can give them to prepare for their future homes.

Summer is here and with it are children around the house twenty-four seven. As much as we appreciate a change from the academic schedule we quickly begin to dread the clutter and mess that more bodies produce. 

If you are like most parents it is easier to pick up and do it yourself rather than listen to the complaints or look at the long faces of the kids when you ask them to put things away in the family room or empty the dishwasher.

Certainly we grow in the virtue of perseverance ourselves when we continue to elicit their help but more important is the consideration of their growth. Summer is not a time to put a halt to their education but actually an ideal time to add to it in practical ways that will prepare them for life and for their own future homes.

Pitching in and sharing the care is all part of a valuable education that is best nourished under the guidance and warmth of parents. Being part of a team that contributes to the comfort of home brings with it the growth of numerous human virtues not the least of which are industriousness, patience, understanding, and the engine of them all – love. 

Parents have always been and will always be the primary educators in things that are of lasting importance. Hang in there, it is all worthwhile!!!

Would love to hear your suggestions and secrets for motivating your children to pitch in and share the care.

With the approaching holidays most homemakers have mixed emotions. On one hand there is the desire and anticipation that everything will be peaceful and beautiful but on the other hand, the reality of the season can bring human and sometimes contradictory moments. We have all felt this tug unless we have had a magic wand that makes everything perfect.

We know that this is the season for giving but sometimes, if we are not careful, we can begin to think that we are the only ones concerned about giving. We have our lists of the many things to be done and just looking at them, on occasion, can bring panic and a “poor me” attitude. The gifts to be bought, the house to be decorated, the cookies and treats to be baked, the cards to be addressed and mailed as well as the ongoing everyday responsibilities can be overwhelming.

In my conversations with homemakers over the years there has been a recurring theme of concern about all those responsibilities falling to them.  We all know in our hearts that this shouldn’t be the case because, after all, we are social beings who are not meant to carry the load alone; but somehow regarding the upkeep of the home we haven’t quite gotten the message.

I was thinking about this as I found myself in the midst of those “to do” lists, realizing that we have a perfect opportunity to give even more by allowing the others to give too. Little things are what make a difference and yet we have a tendency to hold on to those little things because they give us a bit more sense of control. When we allow ourselves to peel off the covering of all the things we do, we soon realize that we hold on to them because we think we can do them better in less time and we like the end results we achieve.

Just think for a moment about all the little things we could learn to share during this “giving season”. How many times have you replied “that’s alright I can handle it”? How many times have you re-arranged the dishwasher because it wasn’t loaded to your satisfaction or raced to throw the garbage out when your teenage son or spouse was just feet away? Pulling out the decorations, planning the menus and even addressing the cards not to mention baking the cookies can be a family affair. So often the others are only waiting to be asked. We may be so used to going it alone that we forget to allow the others to be part of the everyday giving. It is true that the packages may not be wrapped to your ideal or the Christmas table set as perfectly as you would like. The napkins and forks may be on the right side instead of the left with the plates too close together but that little sweetheart of yours will be humming a holiday tune as she does her best.

During this season we naturally think about the material gifts we want to give to those we love but it is also a time to think about the gifts that are meant to last. That idea of giving others the opportunity to be generous can overflow to a new year’s resolution. It is true that they may not be as anxious to help once the glow of the season is over. On the other hand by allowing them to experience a taste of the happy feeling of giving, you may create the catalyst needed to encourage both you and them to share the care of the home.

For some of us it is hard to let go when we want things to be perfect but in reality perfection can never truly be achieved; what can be obtained is a sense of what is important. In sharing the load with the family we realize what a blessing each one is and we also realize we are preparing them for their own homes and families some day. As we look back on our lives, we smile when we think of those intangible gifts we have carried with us through the years and realize many of those gifts were gleaned from the little things we learned growing up. Sharing the care during these days may be an initial sacrifice for those of us who like to go it alone but after all, what is a gift meant to be but a bit of a sacrifice? I don’t know if there is a saying that proclaims ‘with every sacrifice comes a hidden reward’ but if there isn’t such a saying, there should be. In this instance it could be a hidden gift to ourselves that will keep giving when we step back to welcome it.

Happy Holidays!